Friday, September 3, 2010
Thursday, September 2, 2010
the shores of astrakhan are fine
my poem's flesh is not quite attached.
perhaps later.
I read an article this week that talked about child depression, how so many people are just now accepting that people other than older teenagers and up can be depressed. the article said that many people think depression is just "for grown-ups."
people are embarrassing.
perhaps later.
I read an article this week that talked about child depression, how so many people are just now accepting that people other than older teenagers and up can be depressed. the article said that many people think depression is just "for grown-ups."
people are embarrassing.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
ladygagalicious
checking my feed this weekend, when I have real internet.
publishing tip of the day
I am using at least two of those adjectives if I ever publish a chapbook.
I need new music. and a cd that is, at max, ten dollars on b & n's website.
school is draining, as always.
publishing tip of the day
I am using at least two of those adjectives if I ever publish a chapbook.
I need new music. and a cd that is, at max, ten dollars on b & n's website.
school is draining, as always.
Friday, August 20, 2010
pigeons
"airplanes" // b.o.b--the video would be better if hayley and b.o.b were in a shot together at least once. it's disconnected as is.
still remember the line from garcia lorca's "little viennese waltz."
--taken from the version in the sleeping on the wing anthology.
you're good, I think, if you can mention love in a poem and not sound trite.
maybe spanish ii will be made a better class if I apply it to understanding the original spanish version of this poem.
still remember the line from garcia lorca's "little viennese waltz."
Because I love you, my love, I love you
in the attic where the children play,
dreaming ancient lights of Hungary
--taken from the version in the sleeping on the wing anthology.
you're good, I think, if you can mention love in a poem and not sound trite.
maybe spanish ii will be made a better class if I apply it to understanding the original spanish version of this poem.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
august eighteenth
--tired.
editing the juniors' things.
played pool at school for the first time. had to go back into the dorm before the game was finished.
a few hours passed talking to s.a. and speaking of literary things and overdramatically acting out monologues for her.
very tired.
editing the juniors' things.
played pool at school for the first time. had to go back into the dorm before the game was finished.
a few hours passed talking to s.a. and speaking of literary things and overdramatically acting out monologues for her.
very tired.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
go wait in the car.
I miss blogger.
and sleeping.
I woke up from a nap, went to make tea and then go back to sleep, but then I realized I had to clean my room.
v-kristen told me not to always think of getting out of msa my senior year, else my entire year will be shitty, and I agree. I always think of things to change, though. that's healthier than empty complaining.
I never ask people how they are unless I care. this sometimes backfires in situations where I am unnecessarily socially obligated to be someone else's version of polite and the someone else becomes irritated with me.
tired.
I wrote a poem and brought it to class but it feels skeletal. that always happens when I write about my family. poetry blog?
kristen is watching my copy of ponyo.
the broom closet is locked all the damn time and I can't sweep the floor.
and sleeping.
I woke up from a nap, went to make tea and then go back to sleep, but then I realized I had to clean my room.
v-kristen told me not to always think of getting out of msa my senior year, else my entire year will be shitty, and I agree. I always think of things to change, though. that's healthier than empty complaining.
I never ask people how they are unless I care. this sometimes backfires in situations where I am unnecessarily socially obligated to be someone else's version of polite and the someone else becomes irritated with me.
tired.
I wrote a poem and brought it to class but it feels skeletal. that always happens when I write about my family. poetry blog?
kristen is watching my copy of ponyo.
the broom closet is locked all the damn time and I can't sweep the floor.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
I AM SO HUNGRY.
we have spiced cider, lemon-lime beverage, and hot cocoa in our mre stash, but no evaporated fucking milk? what ever did I do to you, kitchen, to deserve this? I just wanted some macaroni.
Monday, July 26, 2010
I've never seen a giraffe fight.
these pictures are for ashlyn. they are from my recent trip to san antonio, where I visited shops (where the figures in the pictures are from) and did other things. I will post the other things later.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
adventure - july fourteenth 2010
last night, I did not sleep. this morning, my mother walked into my room, scolded me for still being awake, and did her morning ablutions, which partly consist of complaining, turning on the computer, and possibly making coffee.
we discussed things for a few minutes before I traipsed outside.
after a few minutes of walking around, I decided--
today, I would explore. [sparkle.]
- I took a shower.
- I put on actual shoes.
the first is not particularly extraordinary, but as for the second--
there are two types of people who do not go barefoot:
1) adventurers.
2) losers.
today, I dropped in the first category.
- I made tea.
actually, I drank a bit of root beer first because I was too thirsty to wait for my tea to steep, but that does not count.
- I drank that tea like a badass.
(and then I worked on my sketchbook pages some while I waited for the tea to reach a temperature that would not numb my tongue. and then I multitasked with tea and sketchbookering.
that's jiang jing on the page; I'm working on a poem about communism again, this time under mao.)
then, to my mother, I said,
"farewell!"
and she said, "what?"
and I said, "goodbye."
and she didn't say anything because she was distracted.
I traipsed outside.
here is my clothed, adventurous foot in action.
bamshizzle.
BUT JUST THEN, I SPOTTED SOMETHING VERY SUSPICIOUS INDEED.
burned items.
burned items that I did not subject to the flame.
must be the chupacabra.
the barbed wire fence protecting my person from cow defecation.
I walked further and eyed thick thorn vines of surely cruel intent—
seriously, nature, is this necessary? these thorned hellish products are all over.
BRACKET OF NO RETURN.
I couldn't go very far in one direction because thorn vines were tying saplings together as to make my adventuring business particularly hard without a machete or five, so I turned left.
at this point I may or may not have contracted five kinds of poison sumac and other itching-inducing plants yet unknown to mankind. also, sweat. nature was possibly trying to tell me that I should give up and go to mcdonald's, where everyone else in mississippi hangs out, but I persevered and refused (the complete nontemptation of a big mac) to stop discovering new horizons.
at least I changed out of my skirt.
look, a sprained ankle if I didn't watch my every step. :D
I stalked the woods further and worked off 1/4th of the little debbie cake I ate yesterday. I made my return trip to the driveway surrounding my homestead, AND AN ORANGE BEAST APPEARED.
I ran away.
except then I found this, which I believe exists to creep out passerby.
the beast followed me.
but then my camera made a clicking noise and AWAY IT SLUNK.
its comrade was not far behind, appearing behind the outline of a moose, undoubtedly its past prey, but I escaped into the house.
so concludes my early morning exploits today.
we discussed things for a few minutes before I traipsed outside.
after a few minutes of walking around, I decided--
today, I would explore. [sparkle.]
- I took a shower.
- I put on actual shoes.
the first is not particularly extraordinary, but as for the second--
there are two types of people who do not go barefoot:
1) adventurers.
2) losers.
today, I dropped in the first category.
- I made tea.
actually, I drank a bit of root beer first because I was too thirsty to wait for my tea to steep, but that does not count.
- I drank that tea like a badass.
(and then I worked on my sketchbook pages some while I waited for the tea to reach a temperature that would not numb my tongue. and then I multitasked with tea and sketchbookering.
that's jiang jing on the page; I'm working on a poem about communism again, this time under mao.)
then, to my mother, I said,
"farewell!"
and she said, "what?"
and I said, "goodbye."
and she didn't say anything because she was distracted.
I traipsed outside.
here is my clothed, adventurous foot in action.
bamshizzle.
BUT JUST THEN, I SPOTTED SOMETHING VERY SUSPICIOUS INDEED.
burned items.
burned items that I did not subject to the flame.
must be the chupacabra.
the barbed wire fence protecting my person from cow defecation.
I walked further and eyed thick thorn vines of surely cruel intent—
seriously, nature, is this necessary? these thorned hellish products are all over.
BRACKET OF NO RETURN.
I couldn't go very far in one direction because thorn vines were tying saplings together as to make my adventuring business particularly hard without a machete or five, so I turned left.
at this point I may or may not have contracted five kinds of poison sumac and other itching-inducing plants yet unknown to mankind. also, sweat. nature was possibly trying to tell me that I should give up and go to mcdonald's, where everyone else in mississippi hangs out, but I persevered and refused (the complete nontemptation of a big mac) to stop discovering new horizons.
at least I changed out of my skirt.
look, a sprained ankle if I didn't watch my every step. :D
I stalked the woods further and worked off 1/4th of the little debbie cake I ate yesterday. I made my return trip to the driveway surrounding my homestead, AND AN ORANGE BEAST APPEARED.
I ran away.
except then I found this, which I believe exists to creep out passerby.
the beast followed me.
but then my camera made a clicking noise and AWAY IT SLUNK.
its comrade was not far behind, appearing behind the outline of a moose, undoubtedly its past prey, but I escaped into the house.
so concludes my early morning exploits today.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Sunday, June 27, 2010
and would spend your nights home with your parents
suburbs with you - herman dune.
I still fancy talking shit
about people we just met
and sittin' down for a coffee with you
coffee with you
I still fancy talking shit
about people we just met
and sittin' down for a coffee with you
coffee with you
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
three in the afternoon
"TJ's whole damn life is one big LARP" - ek weaver on one of her characters from her comic tj and amal.
man.
I have the five ghosts from stars, now. I adore it. and the one track I have from the ep.
man.
I have the five ghosts from stars, now. I adore it. and the one track I have from the ep.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Monday, June 14, 2010
leave me out with the waste.
I'm thinking someone's trying to fuck with me
and set fire to my wood
[. . .]if you can't tell if I’m lying
then you do not belong.
ep ep ep.
my phone is dead.
I am still not writing.
brookhaven at the end of the month or early july.
re: wg^2 // jg & dl--screw talking, I would have let maura drown in her emo poetry.
I liked the rest.
I cannot quite fathom eating two burritos, let alone one. I suppose this is why I am not tiny-size.
eta: zune marketplace is listing music so obscure that even it does not have the music available for purchase--and youtube only has live versions of the music.
and set fire to my wood
[. . .]if you can't tell if I’m lying
then you do not belong.
ep ep ep.
my phone is dead.
I am still not writing.
brookhaven at the end of the month or early july.
re: wg^2 // jg & dl--screw talking, I would have let maura drown in her emo poetry.
I liked the rest.
I cannot quite fathom eating two burritos, let alone one. I suppose this is why I am not tiny-size.
eta: zune marketplace is listing music so obscure that even it does not have the music available for purchase--and youtube only has live versions of the music.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
with just her sister at her side
I was turned away from the act testing center.
obviously, I was too fabulous for the proctors.
also, LOOK LOOK LOOK.
I was struck with new respect for one or both of the authors when reading the first few pages: neutral milk hotel is mentioned and is given appropriate amazing props.
root beer time.
obviously, I was too fabulous for the proctors.
also, LOOK LOOK LOOK.
I was struck with new respect for one or both of the authors when reading the first few pages: neutral milk hotel is mentioned and is given appropriate amazing props.
root beer time.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Monday, May 24, 2010
Sunday, May 23, 2010
there are grammatical errors in this book. (not referencing the following.)
purchased this afternoon: books // godless by dan barker and the new paste (technically a magazine). tea // two boxes of double bergamot earl grey tea and decaf chocolate hazelnut tea (the latter of which I bought for my mother).
sent out letters to s. and z. I hope they appreciate my massive skills with crayon utensils.
"lake pontchartrain" by ludo is a good song. it is also placed in the area where I grew up, though the woods flooded far more than the interstate.
send me letters kthx.
and cheez-its.
and tea bags of known sources.
"high maintenance" means
you're a gluttonous queen
narcissistic and mean.
I have to use cooke and mack in lost odyssey (360), because the guys in my party can't find another way around some ancient ruins. the only purposes they serve are to link their skills to my immortals.
and their voices remind me of the rugrats' voices from that awful cartoon.
the rugrats.
I would probably be angry at myself if I sharpie'd this laptop screen.
sent out letters to s. and z. I hope they appreciate my massive skills with crayon utensils.
"lake pontchartrain" by ludo is a good song. it is also placed in the area where I grew up, though the woods flooded far more than the interstate.
send me letters kthx.
and cheez-its.
and tea bags of known sources.
"high maintenance" means
you're a gluttonous queen
narcissistic and mean.
I have to use cooke and mack in lost odyssey (360), because the guys in my party can't find another way around some ancient ruins. the only purposes they serve are to link their skills to my immortals.
and their voices remind me of the rugrats' voices from that awful cartoon.
the rugrats.
I would probably be angry at myself if I sharpie'd this laptop screen.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
sit down and dream of who you'll be
staying in picayune feels like house arrest. I'm miles away from the city anyway, and when I arrive, there is nothing to do. at least in brookhaven, msa is located in the middle of it, and I can walk places.
I want to go to another coast that is not completely filthy like ours is, even before the spill.
I want to go to another coast that is not completely filthy like ours is, even before the spill.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Thursday, May 13, 2010
fuck! ♥ / g c f c
SELF
STOP WRITING POETRY
WHEN YOU HAVE OTHER THINGS TO DO
REALLY IMPORTANT THINGS
STOP EATING CARROTS.
- conscience.
I had my first usb drive disaster of the year a few minutes ago. it had to be at the very end of the year, too.
STOP WRITING POETRY
WHEN YOU HAVE OTHER THINGS TO DO
REALLY IMPORTANT THINGS
STOP EATING CARROTS.
- conscience.
I had my first usb drive disaster of the year a few minutes ago. it had to be at the very end of the year, too.
you ought to be in bed.
poem is at three and a half pages, with four items of notes (three related to the poem, one requesting a specific birthday gift(s) at the beginning of school, which I will likely not get). still going.
I only know when he
began to dance with me
I could have danced, danced, danced
all night.
I only know when he
began to dance with me
I could have danced, danced, danced
all night.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
may eighth
this town is ugly, its face twisted in childbirth:
I could tell from the goddamn moment
I stepped into this alleyway.
there are children of former children
walking into this shop. everything is overpriced,
free bibles on the stand next to the register.
pink on the radio, two boys singing outside,
and I think they should have spearmint gum
with their improv. hey hello how are you
look at that lady on the bike gran'pa
I
never saw her before. downtown is where
all the fine ladies go, fanny packs and water bottles
they will never drink from draped around their fat rolls.
I could tell from the goddamn moment
I stepped into this alleyway.
there are children of former children
walking into this shop. everything is overpriced,
free bibles on the stand next to the register.
pink on the radio, two boys singing outside,
and I think they should have spearmint gum
with their improv. hey hello how are you
look at that lady on the bike gran'pa
I
never saw her before. downtown is where
all the fine ladies go, fanny packs and water bottles
they will never drink from draped around their fat rolls.
Friday, May 7, 2010
we don't want to sleep tonight
online classes are a drag on my existence. my online classmates' posts are a drag on my existence.
my class ring is pretty, even if it accents how large my fingers already are. ♥
school ends quicksmart the week after next. tea tea tea all the time. well... and the act for the first time.
cellophane
mr. cellophane
should have been my name
my new poem is two and a sixteenth pages :D so far. it is not done yet.
have peer editing for j. to do... I was working on my psychology class during the peer editing session. s;dlfjgslgjk ONLY A FEW MORE ASSIGNMENTS TO GO. I CAN DO THIS. actually... I can do it this weekend, and not have to stay in the library for my online class all morning for the rest of the year (what's left of it, anyway). well. my final exam is already done.
my class ring is pretty, even if it accents how large my fingers already are. ♥
school ends quicksmart the week after next. tea tea tea all the time. well... and the act for the first time.
cellophane
mr. cellophane
should have been my name
my new poem is two and a sixteenth pages :D so far. it is not done yet.
have peer editing for j. to do... I was working on my psychology class during the peer editing session. s;dlfjgslgjk ONLY A FEW MORE ASSIGNMENTS TO GO. I CAN DO THIS. actually... I can do it this weekend, and not have to stay in the library for my online class all morning for the rest of the year (what's left of it, anyway). well. my final exam is already done.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
may second
going back and forth on whether I should keep acting i on my schedule for next year. I enjoy acting, even if I'm not good at it, but it exhausts me, and I need world history. I don't think I'll have a free block next year...
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
arbyyyyy's.
it would be interesting to start a secular/freethought student organization here. I'm really not sure how many members it would procure, this being mississippi... maybe if I served pralines. everyone loves pralines.
the vp is speaking spanish in the bathroom.
the free box on my floor is almost overflowing.
I put a flower in my hair today, but it was uncomfortable.
I rediscovered public libraries. my younger self is, no doubt, horrified at the distant relationship book borrowing and I have had for the past few years. in my defense: my permanent residence's public library is pathetic, and I can't find anything there.
hemingway is pretty ace.
when I shave in the morning
you don't recognize me
I ask if you're still there
and you answer, "truly"
- stars.
also:
according to wikipedia, this is a part of one of brendan behan's poems:
"I absolutely must decline
To dance in the streets with Gertrude Stein
And as for Alice B. Toklas,
I'd rather eat a box of Fucking chocolates."
mmmm. toklas chocolate.
to echo ashlyn's post from long ago... I'm writing nonfiction willingly.* I should probably be having an existential crisis from this, but I have one everyday, so it's passé.
*semi-willingly. I avoid writing about my family and myself. I hate being a coward in any way, so I'm forcing myself to write about these things. GO ME. Tea in two and a-little-more-than-a-half days.
the vp is speaking spanish in the bathroom.
the free box on my floor is almost overflowing.
I put a flower in my hair today, but it was uncomfortable.
I rediscovered public libraries. my younger self is, no doubt, horrified at the distant relationship book borrowing and I have had for the past few years. in my defense: my permanent residence's public library is pathetic, and I can't find anything there.
hemingway is pretty ace.
when I shave in the morning
you don't recognize me
I ask if you're still there
and you answer, "truly"
- stars.
also:
according to wikipedia, this is a part of one of brendan behan's poems:
"I absolutely must decline
To dance in the streets with Gertrude Stein
And as for Alice B. Toklas,
I'd rather eat a box of Fucking chocolates."
mmmm. toklas chocolate.
to echo ashlyn's post from long ago... I'm writing nonfiction willingly.* I should probably be having an existential crisis from this, but I have one everyday, so it's passé.
*semi-willingly. I avoid writing about my family and myself. I hate being a coward in any way, so I'm forcing myself to write about these things. GO ME. Tea in two and a-little-more-than-a-half days.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
typically, it currently involves communism.
I am going to write a romantic poem. I don't think it's a love poem. I don't know if I want to write one of those yet. Or ever.
yim conversation on my day.
instead of telling this blog all about new student day, which was today, I'm going to c & p a conversation on yahoo! instant messenger I held after the day was done, i.e., a conversation that took places a few minutes ago.
ignore the parts that talk about red and other things and references to words exchanged not on the script; we were im doodling.
Anna: new student day. we performed for the accepted future juniors, etc.
Anna: ON A SATURDAY.
Amethyst Rayne: that blows
Anna: meeting the new foetuses was cool, though.
Amethyst Rayne: who
Anna: and cheering and clapping so hard for our staff when they were introduced (along with all of the other students lololol. I love these people) that I think I may have busted a few blood vessels.*
Anna: *exaggeration.
Anna: the incoming juniors. they're foetuses.
Amethyst Rayne: i was making the whole thing red damn
Anna: (: FOILED.
Amethyst Rayne: then we could draw on top of red
Anna: and one of the incoming junior lits asked in q & a if [my instructor] really knew everything, and simultaneously we were all YES SHE DOES SHE WAS A FISHERMAN AND LIVED IN AFRICA AND WENT SPELUNKING.
Anna: and it was all true.
Anna: also, faygo. nom nom nom.
Amethyst Rayne: holy shit
Anna: she's fucking amazing.
Anna: [my instructor] is secretly from another, more awesome universe, so she has no gender. she's just made of awesome.
Amethyst Rayne: nmice
Amethyst Rayne: *nice
Anna: YES.
Anna: and then I talked with donald and shelby about stupid shit and we all held walruses and talked about getting kicked out of abercrombie and fitch and [the history teacher] was there and then we were DISMISSED.
the conversation continued onto less interesting things.
ignore the parts that talk about red and other things and references to words exchanged not on the script; we were im doodling.
Anna: new student day. we performed for the accepted future juniors, etc.
Anna: ON A SATURDAY.
Amethyst Rayne: that blows
Anna: meeting the new foetuses was cool, though.
Amethyst Rayne: who
Anna: and cheering and clapping so hard for our staff when they were introduced (along with all of the other students lololol. I love these people) that I think I may have busted a few blood vessels.*
Anna: *exaggeration.
Anna: the incoming juniors. they're foetuses.
Amethyst Rayne: i was making the whole thing red damn
Anna: (: FOILED.
Amethyst Rayne: then we could draw on top of red
Anna: and one of the incoming junior lits asked in q & a if [my instructor] really knew everything, and simultaneously we were all YES SHE DOES SHE WAS A FISHERMAN AND LIVED IN AFRICA AND WENT SPELUNKING.
Anna: and it was all true.
Anna: also, faygo. nom nom nom.
Amethyst Rayne: holy shit
Anna: she's fucking amazing.
Anna: [my instructor] is secretly from another, more awesome universe, so she has no gender. she's just made of awesome.
Amethyst Rayne: nmice
Amethyst Rayne: *nice
Anna: YES.
Anna: and then I talked with donald and shelby about stupid shit and we all held walruses and talked about getting kicked out of abercrombie and fitch and [the history teacher] was there and then we were DISMISSED.
the conversation continued onto less interesting things.
Friday, April 23, 2010
subject colon
your biographies are boring, you literature people. I want to know more about you than I want to know that you've been published in every magazine/journal/review/good homes and gardens since merlin's time. CAN'T YOU PUT THAT SOMEWHERE ELSE. ):
tea tea tea tea saturday school cry cry MUSIC science articles are blocked acquiring more water this poem sucks.
tea tea tea tea saturday school cry cry MUSIC science articles are blocked acquiring more water this poem sucks.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
april twentieth.
I fail at school and caring about things that are supposed to be important.
I wish I could just rap about pokemon and get a grade for it.
I wish I could just rap about pokemon and get a grade for it.
my childhood.
HOLY SHIT.
I used to go over to my friend's place when I used to not have a modern computer with internet capabilities (typewriter, black screen with orange text ftw) and play disney games. including this one.
I also used her internet for researching a paper on shrimp. but mostly for games and ms paint.
I used to go over to my friend's place when I used to not have a modern computer with internet capabilities (typewriter, black screen with orange text ftw) and play disney games. including this one.
I also used her internet for researching a paper on shrimp. but mostly for games and ms paint.
Monday, April 19, 2010
he resides in my dorm room.
this is my dragon. I received him for christmas last year.
it is time the internet met him.
please imagine me smiling. I am totally smiling. my dragon is smiling--with lots of teeth, even.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
on the ninety-seventh floor overlooking tokyo.
if a high school diploma wasn't more valuable than a GED, I would have gotten the latter a long, long time ago and gone to college. my quintessential recurring line from fifth grade until now, varying in degrees of articulation depending on the year: fuck this shit.
about a month to go before I can pretend formal school does not exist for a while.
about a month to go before I can pretend formal school does not exist for a while.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
and then you may even be drawn into one of those satanic laundry room parties.
College Rant on Putting off Laundry.
Except for the fact that you can't use pennies in laundry machines. But everything else is pathetically true for at least half of my school's population.
If you are one of those cheeky do-good, "hygienic" people, you may spend dollar upon dollar on laundry when there is not even a fatal need for it. Unlike those squares, we the enlightened few wait until the last second, wait one more second after that last second, and THEN we do our laundry. In our procrastination we have saved precious pennies.
Except for the fact that you can't use pennies in laundry machines. But everything else is pathetically true for at least half of my school's population.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
end stop
my short story is fragmenting, and I do not like writing it.
I want to live in an apartment.
I want to live in a house with open space. call the laundry room the mudroom. have a balcony. live on top of the roof in winter for a day, for as long as it takes to count the roof tiles and tire of having no walls.
will grayson, will grayson is out.
this song has the most mediocre metaphor repeated over and over. I still like it.
I was called a bitch today--I've never regretted, and I still don't, what I've said before someone called me that or the equivalent. usually, in my view, what I said would be something they would have said had to someone else in the same situation if they had more of a spine.
or maybe I am just a virulent fucker, ha ha.
tea tea tea tea. why do they only serve cold drinks here? they're either diet or filled with a disgusting amount of sugar.
I want to live in an apartment.
I want to live in a house with open space. call the laundry room the mudroom. have a balcony. live on top of the roof in winter for a day, for as long as it takes to count the roof tiles and tire of having no walls.
will grayson, will grayson is out.
this song has the most mediocre metaphor repeated over and over. I still like it.
I was called a bitch today--I've never regretted, and I still don't, what I've said before someone called me that or the equivalent. usually, in my view, what I said would be something they would have said had to someone else in the same situation if they had more of a spine.
or maybe I am just a virulent fucker, ha ha.
tea tea tea tea. why do they only serve cold drinks here? they're either diet or filled with a disgusting amount of sugar.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
april seventh
I will never be an english major. that I knew before I came here. however--
I will probably never be a creative writing major, either. unless I can focus on poetry... and even then, I wouldn't really want to follow up with it.
it is so odd, seeing the people that want to go through creative writing in college. I like looking at their faces the most out of everyone else's. they are so interesting to observe.
and sometimes this "growing up" (what a dreadful phrase; I have probably done all of the vertical growth in stature possible at this point) business seems like all you're doing is eliminating more options.
I wish I had taken that official's offer and skipped a grade or two. what a drag, school.
I just want to sleep. I want to sleep on the grass outside and I want to sleep in a room with only one bed and in someone else's bed when they are not there and in their bed when they are there and I want to stare up at the ceiling with them. and neither of us will say a goddamned thing.
all I want to do anymore is fucking sleep.
new stars cd this summer. their "fixed" single is available for download--link on their facebook. or on stereogum.
I will probably never be a creative writing major, either. unless I can focus on poetry... and even then, I wouldn't really want to follow up with it.
it is so odd, seeing the people that want to go through creative writing in college. I like looking at their faces the most out of everyone else's. they are so interesting to observe.
and sometimes this "growing up" (what a dreadful phrase; I have probably done all of the vertical growth in stature possible at this point) business seems like all you're doing is eliminating more options.
I wish I had taken that official's offer and skipped a grade or two. what a drag, school.
I just want to sleep. I want to sleep on the grass outside and I want to sleep in a room with only one bed and in someone else's bed when they are not there and in their bed when they are there and I want to stare up at the ceiling with them. and neither of us will say a goddamned thing.
all I want to do anymore is fucking sleep.
new stars cd this summer. their "fixed" single is available for download--link on their facebook. or on stereogum.
Monday, April 5, 2010
april fifth
tapes should still be a popular medium so I can make mix tapes instead of mix cds. mix tapes = romantic, mix cds = how nice. it would be a tale if you could set someone on a course through a series of rooms: every room would have a different song, and the person would have to stay in the room until the song was finished, even if it had ten seconds of unnecessary silence at the end.
related music: "the mixed tape" by jack's mannequin, "mix tape" from the avenue q musical, charlie's playlist in the perks of being a wallflower.
napowrimo is going to be a series of mediocre, hasty poems. I feel it.
white oleander = done reading.
collateral murder. incidents like this have probably happened before, but that doesn't make the isolated incidents any less disturbing. they were laughing about it, these men that represent my country.
I was reading poetry's april 2010 issue, and though I do not like the poem, Outage by rae armantrout, the poet's response to "how far does Like go?", referring to a line from the poem, "Like only goes so far.," was interesting--
"Poetry is full of comparisons and parallels. It seems to trust in resemblance. But the value of rsesemblance--and the empathy it provokes--is rather starkly limited. Even twins or clones don't literally share the same sensations. That makes me wonder what makes a self a self..."
oh, and janie's got a dissolvo ray.
related music: "the mixed tape" by jack's mannequin, "mix tape" from the avenue q musical, charlie's playlist in the perks of being a wallflower.
napowrimo is going to be a series of mediocre, hasty poems. I feel it.
white oleander = done reading.
collateral murder. incidents like this have probably happened before, but that doesn't make the isolated incidents any less disturbing. they were laughing about it, these men that represent my country.
I was reading poetry's april 2010 issue, and though I do not like the poem, Outage by rae armantrout, the poet's response to "how far does Like go?", referring to a line from the poem, "Like only goes so far.," was interesting--
"Poetry is full of comparisons and parallels. It seems to trust in resemblance. But the value of rsesemblance--and the empathy it provokes--is rather starkly limited. Even twins or clones don't literally share the same sensations. That makes me wonder what makes a self a self..."
oh, and janie's got a dissolvo ray.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
earl grey, you evade me.
easter. no one else has quite expressed most of my thoughts, if not feelings, on easter like pz meyers. though my thoughts do not run so far as "a holiday for the mindless."
nonetheless, I am sick of living in a community--a country--in which the majority of persons let a murdering, invisible, nonexistent entity run their lives and say that this god has "planned something for me," or that "I'm doing this for god. I'm helping these people because I know god wants me to."
plan your own life. help people because they are in pain, because they need help, not because you're afraid of eternal suffering yourself if you don't do a "good deed."
not all theists are like that, but so many of them are, and it's frightening to see people believe in a loving god that will send them to hell, some eternal place of pain, if they don't do what they think he tells them to do.
anyway, I took a shower and I feel quite well. :D if only I had hot tea.
nonetheless, I am sick of living in a community--a country--in which the majority of persons let a murdering, invisible, nonexistent entity run their lives and say that this god has "planned something for me," or that "I'm doing this for god. I'm helping these people because I know god wants me to."
plan your own life. help people because they are in pain, because they need help, not because you're afraid of eternal suffering yourself if you don't do a "good deed."
not all theists are like that, but so many of them are, and it's frightening to see people believe in a loving god that will send them to hell, some eternal place of pain, if they don't do what they think he tells them to do.
anyway, I took a shower and I feel quite well. :D if only I had hot tea.
april fourth.
asleep // the smiths. listen.
(except it is already morning.
and you know, parentheses, how difficult it is to awaken
even if e e cummings uses you.)
(except it is already morning.
and you know, parentheses, how difficult it is to awaken
even if e e cummings uses you.)
Friday, April 2, 2010
:|
a senior Vatican priest (and one of his Jewish friends, supposedly) juxtaposed the Jews' persecution and the controversy over sexual abuse linked to the Catholic church. there are far, far too many words for this, and none of them positive.
Monday, March 8, 2010
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