adventure - july fourteenth 2010

last night, I did not sleep. this morning, my mother walked into my room, scolded me for still being awake, and did her morning ablutions, which partly consist of complaining, turning on the computer, and possibly making coffee.

we discussed things for a few minutes before I traipsed outside.

after a few minutes of walking around, I decided--

today, I would explore. [sparkle.]

- I took a shower.
- I put on actual shoes.



the first is not particularly extraordinary, but as for the second--

there are two types of people who do not go barefoot:

1) adventurers.
2) losers.

today, I dropped in the first category.

- I made tea.



actually, I drank a bit of root beer first because I was too thirsty to wait for my tea to steep, but that does not count.

- I drank that tea like a badass.

(and then I worked on my sketchbook pages some while I waited for the tea to reach a temperature that would not numb my tongue. and then I multitasked with tea and sketchbookering.



that's jiang jing on the page; I'm working on a poem about communism again, this time under mao.)

then, to my mother, I said,

"farewell!"

and she said, "what?"
and I said, "goodbye."
and she didn't say anything because she was distracted.

I traipsed outside.
here is my clothed, adventurous foot in action.



bamshizzle.

BUT JUST THEN, I SPOTTED SOMETHING VERY SUSPICIOUS INDEED.

burned items.
burned items that I did not subject to the flame.



must be the chupacabra.



the barbed wire fence protecting my person from cow defecation.

I walked further and eyed thick thorn vines of surely cruel intent—



seriously, nature, is this necessary? these thorned hellish products are all over.



BRACKET OF NO RETURN.



I couldn't go very far in one direction because thorn vines were tying saplings together as to make my adventuring business particularly hard without a machete or five, so I turned left.

at this point I may or may not have contracted five kinds of poison sumac and other itching-inducing plants yet unknown to mankind. also, sweat. nature was possibly trying to tell me that I should give up and go to mcdonald's, where everyone else in mississippi hangs out, but I persevered and refused (the complete nontemptation of a big mac) to stop discovering new horizons.

at least I changed out of my skirt.



look, a sprained ankle if I didn't watch my every step. :D

I stalked the woods further and worked off 1/4th of the little debbie cake I ate yesterday. I made my return trip to the driveway surrounding my homestead, AND AN ORANGE BEAST APPEARED.



I ran away.

except then I found this, which I believe exists to creep out passerby.





the beast followed me.
but then my camera made a clicking noise and AWAY IT SLUNK.





its comrade was not far behind, appearing behind the outline of a moose, undoubtedly its past prey, but I escaped into the house.

so concludes my early morning exploits today.