the shores of astrakhan are fine

my poem's flesh is not quite attached.
perhaps later.

I read an article this week that talked about child depression, how so many people are just now accepting that people other than older teenagers and up can be depressed. the article said that many people think depression is just "for grown-ups."

people are embarrassing.

pigeons

"airplanes" // b.o.b--the video would be better if hayley and b.o.b were in a shot together at least once. it's disconnected as is.

still remember the line from garcia lorca's "little viennese waltz."

Because I love you, my love, I love you
in the attic where the children play,
dreaming ancient lights of Hungary

--taken from the version in the sleeping on the wing anthology.

you're good, I think, if you can mention love in a poem and not sound trite.
maybe spanish ii will be made a better class if I apply it to understanding the original spanish version of this poem.

fuck! ♥ / g c f c

SELF
STOP WRITING POETRY
WHEN YOU HAVE OTHER THINGS TO DO
REALLY IMPORTANT THINGS
STOP EATING CARROTS.
- conscience.

I had my first usb drive disaster of the year a few minutes ago. it had to be at the very end of the year, too.

you ought to be in bed.

poem is at three and a half pages, with four items of notes (three related to the poem, one requesting a specific birthday gift(s) at the beginning of school, which I will likely not get). still going.

I only know when he
began to dance with me
I could have danced, danced, danced
all night.

arbyyyyy's.

it would be interesting to start a secular/freethought student organization here. I'm really not sure how many members it would procure, this being mississippi... maybe if I served pralines. everyone loves pralines.

the vp is speaking spanish in the bathroom.
the free box on my floor is almost overflowing.
I put a flower in my hair today, but it was uncomfortable.
I rediscovered public libraries. my younger self is, no doubt, horrified at the distant relationship book borrowing and I have had for the past few years. in my defense: my permanent residence's public library is pathetic, and I can't find anything there.
hemingway is pretty ace.

when I shave in the morning
you don't recognize me

I ask if you're still there
and you answer, "truly"

- stars.

also:

according to wikipedia, this is a part of one of brendan behan's poems:

"I absolutely must decline
To dance in the streets with Gertrude Stein
And as for Alice B. Toklas,
I'd rather eat a box of Fucking chocolates."

mmmm. toklas chocolate.

to echo ashlyn's post from long ago... I'm writing nonfiction willingly.* I should probably be having an existential crisis from this, but I have one everyday, so it's passé.

*semi-willingly. I avoid writing about my family and myself. I hate being a coward in any way, so I'm forcing myself to write about these things. GO ME. Tea in two and a-little-more-than-a-half days.

typically, it currently involves communism.

I am going to write a romantic poem. I don't think it's a love poem. I don't know if I want to write one of those yet. Or ever.

april fifth

tapes should still be a popular medium so I can make mix tapes instead of mix cds. mix tapes = romantic, mix cds = how nice. it would be a tale if you could set someone on a course through a series of rooms: every room would have a different song, and the person would have to stay in the room until the song was finished, even if it had ten seconds of unnecessary silence at the end.

related music: "the mixed tape" by jack's mannequin, "mix tape" from the avenue q musical, charlie's playlist in the perks of being a wallflower.

napowrimo is going to be a series of mediocre, hasty poems. I feel it.

white oleander = done reading.

collateral murder. incidents like this have probably happened before, but that doesn't make the isolated incidents any less disturbing. they were laughing about it, these men that represent my country.

I was reading poetry's april 2010 issue, and though I do not like the poem, Outage by rae armantrout, the poet's response to "how far does Like go?", referring to a line from the poem, "Like only goes so far.," was interesting--

"Poetry is full of comparisons and parallels. It seems to trust in resemblance. But the value of rsesemblance--and the empathy it provokes--is rather starkly limited. Even twins or clones don't literally share the same sensations. That makes me wonder what makes a self a self..."

oh, and janie's got a dissolvo ray.